One of the things I want to change is the way I deal with stress. I will admit I am a control freak. I have been called a "Monica", (yes that was a FRIENDS reference).
I love my daily planner and a filled out calendar makes me happy. However, lately, my life hasn't fit neatly into a calendar. I tend to "spaz out" when things come at me from left field. I do what I need to do, but don't always have the best attitude, definitely not the gentle and quiet spirit that I truly long to be.It has been a rough couple of weeks for us. Not only was the regular holiday stress upon us, but we have been taking turns getting sick. The day I woke up with my new resolve was the day that Reagan got sick.
Between a sick baby and a husband who was working nights,I started to feel completely overwhelmed, add to that lack of sleep and I was not at my best.
Now I would like to be able to share that I stopped there, took a deep breath, got my attitude together and became a Proverbs 31 woman. But I didn't.
Instead I have spent the last couple of days wallowing in self pity, not the best place to be. I talked myself into feeling unappreciated and alone.
So what could I have done differently? Well, to start with I tried to make the changes myself. Instead of turning to the One who has all the strength I decided that I could do it myself. The other thing is that I need to realize that I need to pray continually for contentment. I think alot of my stress comes from fighting against what is going on, wanting to control the people and activities that make up my life. I need to give up that control (you have no idea how hard it was to type that last sentence!)
I have to figure out how to give up this need of control in order to be truly happy. I don't know exactly how to do it yet, but let me do a little thinking and I will get back to you!
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